Once again I find myself in a position of taking on the responsibility for someone elses emotions. The blame for their state is shifted onto me because of a perceived sadness, but I realize that I am sad because of their state.
The contradictory nature of this intrigues me. I can't shift blame onto them for my perceived sadness. I just know that when I'm not around them I am not sad - except for my perception of being ignored which is blamed on my sadness.
So - am I blaming them? Am I holding them responsible for my state? Methinks that I need to get a grip on this before it gets out of control. I'm getting a handle on a lot of things in my life, but this one seems to repeat. It is self perpetuating in a most disturbing way.
I need to push through and prove my theory. I've been working on maintaining my state of happiness and well being in their presence, but it doesn't seem to affect their reaction to me. If this is the case then their excuse of my sadness causing the issue is false. No?
Love your fate. This is ringing in my head. Why do I know the wind should blow? Because it's blowing. Here we go. Obviously I am in the midst of another lesson. Let me not linger so long on the solution that it all falls apart again.
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